今天，我们继续通过拆解（原创）范文的方式理解雅思大作文的行文思路，达到理想的 Coherence and Cohesion – How well your thoughts and the pieces of information are connected.

2019年6月22日雅思考试真题
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As countries develop, more and more people buy and use their own cars.
Do you think the advantages of this trend for individuals outweigh its disadvantages for the environment?

虽然我们今天讲解的主题是大作文的CC ，但是关于审题还是需要多一句嘴。

* 审题时注意：对于个人的好处是否大于对于环境的坏处，而对于个人的坏处不在题目问题意义之内
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Worldwide, car ownership is increasing, and the increase in some countries is tremendous. [建立CC的方式之一：词性变化：前半句的动词分词increasing到后半句变成对应的名词increase。] However, the benefits for individuals of the trend can hardly offset the harm to the environment. [好的CC也要求大家在行文时不出现/极少出现废话，那么，我们就可以在introduction的第二句立刻直接表明立场。]

Car owners benefit from driving. [进入主体部分的句话，很短，但是意思明确。好的CC要求话语简洁达意。] Immediately after a person purchases a car, traveling is no longer subject to the timetables or routes of buses or trains, or the availability of taxis. [在句表明要谈论benefits之后，迅速直接说明benefit是什么。好的CC都是信息进展很快，没有赘述的。] Instead, [准确恰当的逻辑连接词。这是好的CC的必备。] people travel as they please. In addition, [准确恰当的逻辑连接词。这是好的CC的必备。] sitting on the driver’s seat may be more comfortable than standing in a cramped and crowded compartment of a bus or a train. [如果一句话就把事情说清楚了，那就不要故意增加废话。赘述和赘肉一样令人不悦。好的CC就是没有赘述，赘述分散读者的注意力。]

On the other hand, [准确恰当的逻辑连接词。这是好的CC的必备。] cars are not friendly to the environment, making our cities and towns less habitable. [如果接下来有数个点要讨论，那么序数词可以帮助读者明确内容的结构。这也是好的CC的必需。] First, cars emit pollutants, many of which are highly toxic. Meanwhile, [准确恰当的逻辑连接词。这是好的CC的必备。] the carbon emissions prove to be a major cause for the current unfavorable climate change around the globe. Cars also [不要小看这个also，也行文至此的必备。说明这是不利之处的第二点。] produce noises. Drivers inevitably use the horns, and the noise is irritating. Even though [这个让步关系的连词短语很重要。在此之后的内容应对了上一句的内容，又与主句的内容形成了逻辑关系。] the use of horns may be strictly prohibited in some zones in some cities, the car engine generates sounds that are annoying. A noisy environment is certainly undesirable. [好的CC需要行文的内容有进展性的顺延。这句话，把讨论顺延到了本段的关键：不利，这一点从选词undesirable可以看出。] In addition, [准确恰当的逻辑连接词。这是好的CC的必备。] the large traffic volume, even if the cars go in an orderly fashion, causes displeasure and upsets people. [行文时，内容从笼统宽泛到具体详细，也是常见的CC搭建方式。此处前一句的两个关键词displeasure 和upset在下一句中有说到“为什么”（即下一句的状语部分）。] Having so many cars lining up on the road, [看，就是这个状语部分说到了“为什么”。] a city feels crowded and uncomfortable.

In conclusion, the worldwide increase in the ownership of private cars is a controversial phenomenon. It may be good for individuals as they have cars and thus are independent in traveling and travel with comfort. [如果可以把段落里的内容浓缩成短语形式，措辞简洁高效不过度重复，CC会好。] However, the advantages cannot compare to the damage caused to the environment. [该笼统的地方就笼统，不过度重复之前的信息。]